In response...

I am glad to hear that you do not listen to people that try to bring you down.  I have found that the people that do that often do so to make themselves feel better by making others feel bad.  I have never understood that but recognizing it creates and awareness and helps to put it in its place!  It is hard to accept compliments - it is often hard to believe them.  Sitting back and being aware that people don't have to say anything helps to give their comments value.  Looking in the mirror and smiling is often an easy start to finding the beauty we each have within ourselves.  Here is a poem I wrote about that:

A Beautiful Soul

Most of my life I have heard – you are such a beautiful girl.  You have such a pretty face.

 I look in the mirror – where is this girl they are all talking about. 

The woman I see looking back at me is insecure. 

The woman staring right through me is scared. 

She is lonely, terribly lonely. 

She feels betrayed. 

She feels to blame for causing pain.  Did she ever mean to cause anyone pain?  No, but she carries that burden. 

When I look back into that mirror I see a woman who has had to be tacit to survive though it is so not in her nature. 

I see a woman who hates confrontation so much that she has allowed herself to become a victim.  I see a woman who despises herself for allowing her soul to be victimized. 

As I stand here in front of this mirror now.  I look closer.  I look deep into those hazel green eyes. I am searching for the girl in the woman. 

I think I see her.

No, I know I see her.  As I look into this woman’s eyes now I see hope.

I look closer – I see strength.  In this strength I see desire. 

Desire for change.  Desire for love.  Desire for happiness.

I see the girl that used to live inside this woman.  The girl that was told, “If you would only lose a little weight you would be beautiful, because you have such a pretty face”.  I see the girl that was told by men she was pretty only to be used and destroyed by them.  I see the girl who believed in love and hope and happiness. 

I look closely at this beautiful girl and watch as she sheds the burdens she has allowed to gather around her and pull her down.  I look closely and finally I see beauty.  

I see a beautiful soul.

Cat